I wonder if we are all just bags of meat wandering around not knowing what we are doing. I also realize we are intelligent beings capable of observation and what we are willing to put up with. The thing I am hooked on is forgiveness. People are reactionary and unskilled. I am, too. If someone hurts your feelings, that means you have to pick your battles. Do you give a shit enough to say something? Or do you forgive them for being insensitive? They obviously have not thought about what they have said. If you care enough about yourself and the person talking to you, be kind and think about what you have to say to get them to "get it". Otherwise, cold cock a mother fucker (verbally)?

I went to a dinner party a few weeks ago and was treated like gold. The food was amazing, the conversation stimulating, it was kind of historical for me. I have yet to call the host and thank him for this experience. I guess I'm just a bag of meat. I hope he forgives me for that.

Well, what the hell is going on?

Considering all the family obligations and personal issues with family and friends, Christmas can be a bust. But how awesome the intensity! All the recipes we taste, the wonder of what people think you like, and the strange patterns people fall into during the holidays. It's brutal and worth looking into.

Happy New Year and to embracing the past and future.

Hopelessness?

Hopelessness. Sometimes it takes over when things seem too shitty to look through the muck. Well, so many people deprive themselves of pleasure on purpose, and others create chaos. Others pretend they don't want drama but feel more alive when things are dramatic. It is all too muddy to decipher but one thing is true. If you can try not to take yourself too seriously, to take a deep breath (have an orange soda-two cubes), to actually drink and smoke, you are doing okay. Also, try and be thankful for people you can vent to/talk to. If you have that you are lucky. When the shit hits the fan, acknowledge how well (or how poorly) you are handling it. That will help you feel less like someone with a desire to write songs for the weather channel, and more like someone writing the "great american novel".

taking time to put out

This is the time of year where everyone is looking to nest. My single friends are spraying the appropriate amounts of testosterone and estrogen mists. Good luck, but remember to take the time to "put out". Listen more. Laugh. Actually put yourself out there without the skidmarks in your underwear. Wash your sheets. And above all, it's not always about getting laid. It's about working on the things you would like to do to be a happier person. Will a significant other help you with that? Well, it might be nice to have a warm body next to you this winter when it's really cold out there, but everyone is much more attractive when they have their shit together. I know, easy for me to say, I'm in a committed relationship. So if you want to call bullshit, go ahead. But this advice pertains to people in relationships, too. I hope this fall brings everyone all the action they can possibly handle! But until then, put out all the good things about you and work on the bad ones. It will get you laid.